You are actually here because you understand the meaning of divorce and probably contemplating it so I am not going to talk more about the definition of divorce. But for the purpose of this post, I will like you to know that divorce is simply the act of separating a married couple and it's usually done by the court of law.
After divorce, the couple are free to live their separate lives and even remarry if they feel like doing so. The children are often left in the custody of either of the couple, usually the woman and the man is made to pay alimony and child support.
Most times, it's the female partner that usually initiates divorce especially in America and some other developed countries. This is because divorce seems to favour women more than men financially.
The woman gets paid and also gets to keep the children and enjoys financial benefits.
From my little research, I have come to realise that the woman loses more after divorce than the man. Yes, the man loses only money and the children but believe me, he can gain these two back at any stage in his life.
The man can remarry, in fact he can even marry a very young and beautiful virgin better than his ex wife, give birth to new set of children, make more money and live happily ever after.
But for the woman, this is exactly what you should expect after a divorce and they are a disadvantage:
1. You become both Daddy and Mommy in the house. This means that you must not fall sick and you must not get tired.
2. Only you wakes up to prepare the children for school, take them to school and must bring them back daily. Apart from that, you will need to work hard to earn money for yours and their upkeep and you have to ensure that the house is clean and tidy and that food is always ready.
3. When you are sick, especially at night, nobody to take you to the hospital and no one to care for your children. In this situation, you will always be at the mercy of strangers or family and friends for help but these people get tired, you know.
4. What of the days you oversleep? Your children will be late for school because there's no one to wake you up.
5. Now, how do you mentor your male children as a woman? Whether you believe it or not, boys raised by single mothers end up becoming bad boys and consequently, bad husbands in future.
6. You hope to find new love but the bad news is that it's not easy to find new love. The reason is that you might be too busy with the children and job and might not have time to look for a lover. You might end up finding some lovers who are in your life because they need something like money or shelter from you and not necessarily because they love you because only a few men would want to be in a relationship with a woman that has children from another marriage.
7. You will feel lonely most times and will secretly wish that you never left your husband.
8. What of the days that you need to change light bulbs, can you do that alone? Who will help to hold the ladder for you? How about mowing the lawns? Will you be financially capable of employing a labourer?
9. How about leaving your job because you are tired, can you do that as a single woman with kids to care for without wondering what would happen next?
10. Can you switch on the generator every night and switch it off before you sleep every night? (For those in Nigeria). Come on, God knows that only one person cannot cope with all these that's why he created marriage.
11. When you start getting old, you will be absolutely lonely because your children will have to move away to live on their own.
12. Most divorced women end up being frustrated. You wouldn't want to end up that way. Do you know that you will no longer be as attractive to men as you were before giving birth?
13. The young guys you admire for a relationship might mock the hell out of you, calling you an old cargo and will not even look at you no matter how hard you try to gain their attention. What more can be more humiliating?
14. The men you succeed in getting after divorce will only use and dump you and as you get older, they won't even want to use and dump you again. They will only look at you and move on, leaving you lonelier than ever.
15. You might be forced to be at the mercy of sex toys. This is frustrating as well.
16. Your children will feel frustrated growing up without their father and might end up becoming miscreants in the future.
I think it is better to avoid divorce by all means by respecting your husband and being submissive to him for the sake of your future and that of your children.
If your husband notices these two traits in you, he will change and become a better person and you will both live happily ever after. That's the secret of good marriages.
For husbands that cheat on their spouses. As a woman, do you know that it's not compulsory for you to get a divorce because your husband cheated on you? Do you know that you can actually forgive?
Do you know that you can remain in the marriage even if you cannot forgive?
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